The Juicy Shrimp Shack

By Lydia Floren

There are not many restaurants in our small town (unless you count bars and fast food joints). With so little to choose from, any time a new place opens up we try to check it out. Recently one of my patients told me about a new eating establishment called The Juicy Shrimp Shack, so on my birthday I talked my husband and mother-in-law into trying it out.

The Juicy Shrimp Shack was brand new. It did not have any ratings on Trip Advisor or Zomato. It did, however, have a Facebook page. And a map with a link. So after the three of us piled in the car, I clicked on the link, programmed the GPS and we were on our way. We headed west on I-94 and, after about 15 miles, turned off at the stripper bar exit. (I am sure it has a name, but that’s what everyone around here calls it). The GPS said to turn north, so we turned, and started driving. Pretty soon, we were surrounded by farms and fields. It was beautiful – rolling hills, stately red barns, grazing cattle, and field after lush, green field. Sigh. There’s nothing like Wisconsin in the summertime.

But, it was late. And we were hungry.

I plugged the coordinates into the Google GPS instead of the Apple one. No change. So we kept going, but after a few more miles, I was really starting to get worried. Locating a restaurant in the middle of farmland didn’t seem like a wise business strategy to me. If the Juicy Shrimp Shack is this far out in the country, who would find it? And if no one ate there, would the food be fresh, or old? Would we get sick by eating it?

Finally the GPS said, “Turn right at the next intersection. Your destination is one mile ahead on the left. “

But turning right put us on a skinny dirt road lined with closely packed cornstalks.

I asked Andrew to stop. And to my husband’s credit, he didn’t say a word. I, again, accessed the Juicy Shrimp Shack’s web page from my cell phone (thank God for Verizon), but this time I looked up the actual address written on the page. When I entered that in to the GPS everything on the screen changed.

The GPS lady said “you are way the heck off base. What were you thinking?” Not really. She just droned, “REPROGRAMMING,” and told us to turn around and head back 10 miles to the I-94 exit, where we first got off.

And there it was, right next door to the girly place. (I’m not kidding.)

And it was awesome!!!

Reprogramming your GPS

I do have a point here. Maybe you have something – a career path, financial purchase, relationship, job – programmed into your life’s GPS. And, it seems right. To the best of your knowledge, you made a good decision. But, the further you get down the road in this project, or relationship, or field of study, the more things just don’t seem to be clicking. Something feels off. You are more and more hesitant to keep going forward.

Pay attention to that feeling. And don’t be afraid to take a big step back and reevaluate. Get more information. See what other options are out there. And then pray through the decision again. You may come to the same conclusion, or you may come to a different one.

And, even if you find yourself backtracking a good bit to get on a different road, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just remember: with God, no experience is wasted. God has used and will use every mile you travel to teach you things, and bless others along the way.

Time to regroup?

Is it time to regroup? No worries. Just stop. Thank God for where you are. And, where He is going to lead you next.

And before you get your life back in gear, take a moment to enjoy what’s right in front of you. Beautiful.

Going Through the Motions

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Going Through the Motions

by Lydia Floren

Greeting cards are a part of our family’s birthday tradition. As a “good husband,” Andrew knows this. And since he is not a homemade card kind of guy, every year he faithfully buys me, and gives me, a few cards – most funny, and, at least one is serious.

One year, I was particularly touched by the sweet sentiment in the “serious” card he gave me.

“Oh, Honey! That is beautiful. Thank you!” With a tear in my eye, I glanced up at him.

He had this blank look on his face. And, I got a little suspicious.

“Did you read it?” I asked. (His signature was at the bottom, so it would seem like a natural assumption that he had.)

His expression turned sheepish.

“Really? You gave me a card, but you didn’t even read it?”

“Well I glanced at it. It looked like something you would like.”

At first I was hurt. And then, I burst out laughing.

The next year, when I opened “the mushy birthday card” not only was his signature at the bottom, but there was a little “p.s.” afterwards:

“Yes, I read it.”

How often do we glance at God’s word, but don’t take the time to really read it? Or, we say a perfunctory prayer, but our minds are wandering elsewhere? When we do, we aren’t fooling anyone but ourselves. And, we miss out. Our relationship with God is the most important relationship in the world. If we truly believe that, committing our full attention every day to a verse or two in the Bible – and listening to what He might be saying to us through it – is time well spent.

Have you been going through the motions of spending time with God? If so, don’t miss out another day. Take some time. Give Him your undivided attention. It will bless your socks off. Do it regularly, and it will change your life.

“You have the words of eternal life.” John 6:68

“For they deliberately overlook this fact, that the heavens existed long ago, and
the earth was formed out of water and through water by the word of God.” 2 Peter 3:5

“Your word is a lamp to guide my feet and a light for my path.” Psalm 119:105

A Dead Turkey

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A Dead Turkey

by Lydia Floren

I’ve never seen a dead turkey before.

Wait, I take that back. I’ve seen hundreds of dead turkeys. In the grocery freezer section, right before Thanksgiving.

But, I’ve never seen a dead turkey like this.

Sometime between morning chores and afternoon errands, this guy appeared on the edge of our lawn.

I walked up to him. halfway thinking he’d get up and run off.

Nope.

I made some noise, nudged him with my toe.

Nothing.

Then, I noticed the flies buzzing around.

Hmmmm. Maybe he wasn’t just sleeping.

I texted my husband.

I said, “I think we have a dead turkey in our front yard.” And then, “I’m not sure I’ve ever said that sentence before.”

I sent him a picture.

Although I am not sure, in retrospect, why he would want a picture of a dead turkey on his phone. (Sort of like the time someone texted me a picture of their kid’s poop. There are some lines that just need to be drawn. And feces, and probably dead turkeys, are on the other side of those lines.)

I went off to run my errands, hoping, though not terribly optimistic, that the big bird would wake up and move along while I was gone. Not sure what I would do if he didn’t. Didn’t really want a rotting turkey on the lawn.

When I got to the beauty shop and told my hairdresser about it, she suggested calling animal control, although I wasn’t sure why they would want him. He wasn’t really a rabies risk. But maybe he had some strange disease that they were testing for.

When I got back home, the turkey was gone.

Wow.

Maybe he was just napping. And woke up and wandered off.

I walked in the house and found my husband, Andrew, on the back porch. He was leaning on the rail with his B.B. pistol. On the lookout for crows and bunnies. (They eat my flowers.)

“Did you see the turkey?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you do something with him?”

“Yeah.”

“What did you do?” (Surely he didn’t put him in the trash can. The trashmen didn’t come for another week.)

“I got a shovel, picked him up, and threw him over the back fence, down the hill.”

“Where?”

“Over by that big tree on the right, about halfway down. If you walk over that way, you can see him.”

“No thanks. I’m good.

Thank you very much for getting rid of him.

You are my hero.”

“I’d rather be your hero than your dead turkey.”

Do you have a dead turkey in your yard? A disappointment? A grudge? A sin you keep beating yourself up for? An offense, or wrong you need to apologize for? Don’t wait around for it to vanish on its own. Do something about it. Take a shovel. Pick it up. And throw it out, so its rotting flesh doesn’t stink up your life.

And then move on.

Do not call to mind the former things. Or ponder things in the past. Behold I will do something new. Will you not be aware of it?

The Key Ingredient – Planning Series, Part 4

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The Key Ingredient – Planning Series, Part 4

by Lydia Floren

Last week, we talked about the fact that everyone approaches planning a little differently. Some are Perfectionists, others Minimalists or No-Planners. And most of us are Nomadic planners – we plan differently based on which situation we are in. No matter what kind of planner you are, without prayer, your plans will not be all they could be. The best plans always include one key ingredient: prayer.

Planning without prayer is like making bread without yeast: things just don’t turn out the way you thought they would.

And, when I talk about prayerful planning, I don’t mean forming a strategy and then asking God to put His stamp of approval on it. That is like mixing bread dough, and then sprinkling yeast on the loaves right before you slide them in the oven. In order for prayer to be effective in your planning process, it must be in the mix, right from the start.

Think about it. Doesn’t it make sense to ask the Ultimate Life Coach, the One Person who knows you best and loves you most, what His perspective is? What He thinks your plans should be? Doesn’t it seem logical to give veto power to the only person in the universe that knows the future? That can help you avert disaster by aborting your plans? After all, He is the one who said:

I know the plans that I have for you. Plans for welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11.

Whether you are Perfectionist, a Nomadic, a Minimalist or a No-Plan Planner, your plan will always go better with prayer. And here is an extra bonus, the cherry on top that will absolutely revolutionize your whole planning process: after you set goals and make plans, keep on praying about those plans. Ann Ortlund, in her book Disciplines of a Beautiful Woman, said that she saw a big difference in how many of her goals and plans were realized, after she started praying about them on a regular basis.

So plan away. However it works for your life and your personality. Just remember to discuss it all with God, and keep on talking to Him. Keep bringing your plans to Him, asking for His insight and direction and wisdom in how to focus on, carry out, and even adjust, your strategy. And then take His advice.

Prayer is the key ingredient to great plans.

In fact, prayer is the best plan of all.

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Plan Is Not a 4-Letter Word. Not Really. (Planning Series, Part 3)

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Plan Is Not a 4-Letter Word. Not Really.

by Lydia Floren

Everyone plans. But not everyone sees themselves as a “planner.” Usually, we think of “planners” as OC perfectionist types. (This is a little like me, at least the former me. I am a perfectionist-in-recovery, in case you forgot.) But whether we realize it or not, we are all planners. We all make plans. We just have different ways of doing it.

For example, there are the Perfectionist Planners. These people (OK, we) often construct elaborate, detailed moment-by-moment plans for their (our) lives. And, often do so for those around us as well. (Sorry, guys.) We have extensive to-do lists and specific timetables. And high expectations. (Again, sorry)

The Minimalist Planners plan for survival. They do what they have to do to keep things going. They are focused on paying the bills, getting the schoolwork done, finishing the project. A Minimalist Planner might have a life plan as simple as this:

Monday thru Friday: Get up. Take a shower. Get dressed. Go to work. Come home. Eat. Go to sleep.

Saturday and Sunday: Catch up from what you didn’t get done Monday through Friday. Maybe go to church. Take a nap.

Finally there are the No-Plan Planners. No-Plan Planners try to live life as it comes. They never set their alarm. Heck, they probably don’t even own an alarm clock. They get up when they wake up, and do whatever strikes their fancy. But what No-Plan Planners don’t realize is that choosing not to plan is, in fact, a plan. Not a very sustainable one (unless someone is paying all your bills), but a plan nevertheless.

Most of us are Nomadic Planners. By that I mean that we shift from one planning approach to another, depending on the situation. For example, in my medical practice, I tend to be a Perfectionist Planner. The rest of the time I am more of a Minimalist. But when I go on vacation, I am a No-Plan Planner.

No judgment here. There is no right or wrong way to plan. Everyone approaches life from a unique perspective, and so we all will have our own unique way of planning. And even though we have our usual way of approaching planning, that might change based on what we are doing, or where we are in our time of life.

But, I will say this: I sure hope if I need a brain surgeon, he or she is an OC Perfectionist Planner, at least in the O.R.!

Everyone makes plans.

Planning is a necessary, integral part of life.

No matter what our approach to planning, just understand: plan is not a 4-sletter word. Not really.

For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? Luke 14:28

What kind of planner are you?

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Halftime Adjustments – Planning Series Part 2

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Halftime Adjustments

Planning Series Part 2

by Lydia Floren

My husband Andrew and I are big football fans, and though I am by no means an expert, I have learned a few things about the game over the years. Mostly by osmosis. Sitting on cold metal benches, trying to figure out what exactly a defensive end does. Chatting about strategy and strengths with fellow parents as we sell things for fundraisers or serve up food to sweaty players. Listening to my husband and three sons rehash games at the dinner table. Playing tag football with the kids in the front yard. (Well, until a career ending knee injury sidelined me a few years ago.)

I also learned the game by asking a lot of questions from people who know more than I do. (So far, Aaron Rodgers hasn’t responded to my emails, but it’s OK. I understand. He’s a little busy right now.)

One of my favorite things about watching football, is seeing how things change in the second half. The coaches can spend weeks developing a sound game plan, and drilling it into their team. But usually, as the first half unfolds, things don’t go exactly according to plan. Maybe a key player gets hurt. Or the opposing quarterback is having the best game of his life. For whatever reason, the team’s carefully crafted strategy is not working as anticipated. Coaches know this. Anticipate it, even. And they have a plan in place to change the plan.

It’s called a half-time adjustment.

At the half, all those guys that have been communicating through their headsets (screaming is a form of communication isn’t it?) get together. They talk about what’s working, what’s not, and what could be done differently. And then, they craft an amended plan for the second part of the game. These changes, I learned, are called “halftime adjustments.” Well, I don’t know if “halftime adjustment” is an official moniker in the NFL playbook, but I know that’s what it is called. And everybody does it.

So why am I thinking about football in July, when there are absolutely NO GAMES on TV unless you count grainy reruns of Joe Namath? And yes, I actually know who that is.

Here’s why: July 1 is the halfway point in the calendar year. And so July is the month I make my own halftime adjustments to my year’s game plan. In January I write down some goals and plans for coming year. Mid-year I set aside some time to review the first 6 months – what’s working, what needs to change. And then I pray – I consult with God the Ultimate Life Coach – about what adjustments need to be made for the second half.

Why half-time adjustments are necessary

Why do this? Because life happens. We all know that things rarely go as anticipated. Maybe you lose your job, or move cross country, or find out your child has a learning disability, or a special gift. Or maybe you have an illness that has sapped your strength, or are faced with a big decision that took you by surprise.

Or, maybe you discover that your plans are just not realistic. That happens to me a lot. I tend to overestimate how much time I have, and underestimate how much time or energy something will take. A perfectionist, even a perfectionist-in-recovery like me, can make some pretty elaborate plans that have little chance of success. For example:

eat nothing but vegetables, ever.
exercise 1.5 hrs. per day. Every day.
read all my medical journals before the weekend.
finish writing the last ½ of my book in the next 4 weeks.

It doesn’t take long to fail. And that starts a downward spiral of negative self-talk that can be paralyzing.

So my midyear halftime adjustments are a lifesaver. It forces me to face my limitations and accept that I cannot do as much as I think I can – or do it as quickly as I would like. It helps me to get back on track, and allows me to give myself a break. And it injects a little reality into my overall planning process, so that next week/month/year, I can come up with a more achievable set of goals and strategies. And, I don’t abandon planning altogether.

What do things look like at halftime for you? have you set unrealistic goals for yourself? Or drifted off course from those things you really want to focus on this year? Are there things that need to change? Expectations, and plans, that need to be revised?

Just do it. Take a little time out to reflect and pray. And adjust. I guarantee you will be glad you did.

Want more on planning? See:

God’s Plan A: Planning Series Part One

4 Steps to Planning the Year

Pray Plan Pray

The Beginning of All Things, by Lydia Floren

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The Beginning of All Things

by Lydia Floren

This is an excerpt from the book I am writing about learning to live a God-guided life:

There once was a man and a woman who dwelled together in indescribable bliss. They lived in nature, surrounded by beauty – fresh smells, clear water, crisp fruit. They enjoyed each other’s company, plus the free and easy relationship with the One who had formed each of them, and had brought them to the paradise where they lived. They were healthy and happy – you might even say joyous – enjoying life to the fullest.

The Maker had given them one warning, one simple rule in this haven of life/joy: Don’t touch the fruit that grows on one tree, the one called the “Knowledge of Good and Evil.” This fruit is not good to eat.

That is all.

But the man and woman were curious, and surrendered to the Temptation to be like God, on equal footing with the Creator. They wanted to know for themselves, to decide for themselves what was good, and what was not. So, they disregarded God’s one rule, and ate.

Immediately, they were changed. They looked at things differently. They could see all kinds of potential good and evil, but had trouble deciding which was which. They decided that their nakedness wasn’t good and covered themselves. For the first time they felt shame. They decided they had done something wrong. And so, they decided to avoid God.

God cried.

And then did what He had to do. With great sorrow, He gave them the result of their choice: life outside of the garden.

God’s Grace

And then, all alone, God made a plan for the future, so that someday, this relationship would be restored to the way it used to be. It was a costly plan – a life for all lives, a choice for all choices. He would send His son to live in the world, and pay the price for their choice, and all the choices that followed.

The man and the woman settled outside of the garden. They had children and grandchildren. And they passed their skewed sense of truth, of right and wrong, down through their lineage. Over the centuries, they drifted away from the life-giving connections with their Maker, until he was just a distant memory, and then an ancient tale – remembered by a few, believed by even fewer.

But their Maker never stopped loving them and reaching out to them. Since these progeny had never known bliss, they had no idea what they were missing. There was a haunting emptiness that remained in all of these people, from generation to generation. An emptiness that – had they known it – could only be filled with God.

Yet somehow, in their minds, they had come to believe that God was their enemy.

After many years, God’s plan came to pass. He chose to visit their land – in the form of His son – to be one of them and guide them back to the ancient truth and ways. They thought they knew how to make things right, but they really didn’t. And so, He showed them that the only way to bridge the gap was to receive His gift of forgiveness and life, and choose to follow Him. And He demonstrated through His words and actions what it looked like to live that way. Before He left, he gave them the ultimate gift – His life – to make this all possible.

It seemed too good to be true. But it was true.

God was not their enemy.

He was their Creator, their Loving Father – the only one who knew them completely and loved them unconditionally. And He did what it took so that He could welcome them back into the warmth and safety of relationship with Him. So that they could live the life they were created to live.

Adam and Eve had a choice of whether to live their lives on their own, or to follow God‘s will. They chose the former, and their choice had consequences. It led to the loss of their home, and the disruption of the easy loving relationship they had with their Father. Every one of Adam and Eve’s descendants, including us, has suffered because of their choice. Amazingly, because of God’s love and grace, we still – again – have a choice: to live our lives on our own, or to invite God in and choose to follow Him.

Inviting God In

Do you want to experience the joy of living the life you were created to live? To have a true sense of identity and value, to know that you belong, and that you are safe – that your life will never end? If so, then if you haven’t done so, now is a great time to make the choice to invite God in to your life and follow Him. You can do that by simply talking to Him – praying. Here is an example of such a prayer, based on the acronym GRACE (G- Give thanks, R- Release, A-Accept, C- Continue, E- Enjoy)

G Thank you, God for creating me and loving me enough to give your life so that I could be in relationship with you forever.

R I choose to receive your forgiveness for ignoring you and going my own way, and I Release all of my past and future into your hands.

A I Accept your gift of hope and healing, and open the door of my heart to let you in.

C I look forward to Continuing to learn to live by your wisdom and direction,

E and to Enjoy the freedom and intimacy of your company every day.

Have you pray this prayer? Congratulations! You have begun the adventure of living a God-guided life.

Sharing the Joy of Faith: Life-Giving Rain

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Today’s post is provided by guest blogger, Chris Lawson. Thanks, Chris!

Sharing the Joy of Faith Life-Giving Rain

by Chris Lawson

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what is not seen.” Hebrews 11:1

The summer of 2016, when I was recovering from surgery, I could only make it to the bottom of this mountain. Each day, I would get a little farther. My husband walked with me and encouraged me. I remember one day, I got to the top, and even made it around the turn. I had to send him down to get the car, to come up and get me. He was so patient and loving.

God is the same way with us. Our faith sometimes feels covered with fog, but the Son comes and breaks through the clouds and even turns them into life-giving rain in the far distance.

Prayer: Dear Father, Thank you for reaching out to us when we are frail and beg for healing. You are such a good Father. Help us to keep the faith and believe in healing and most of all to believe in Your will for us to heal. Help us to look beyond what we see as impossible to see Your Possible, to be able to experience the witnessing of Your Glory. In Jesus’ Holy Name, Amen.

Ditching the Jonah Life

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Ditching the Jonah Life

by Lydia Floren

Jonah was an interesting guy. He had a relationship with God. He talked to God, and listened to Him. But he didn’t always agree with Him. He felt like he could—should, in fact–pick and choose which of God’s commands he should follow, and which he would ignore. When God told him to go to Ninevah and tell people about Him, Jonah balked, and then downright refused.

“UUUUUMMMMMM, Naaaaah, I don’t think so God. All due respect, I think that is a really bad idea. That may be in your plan, but not in mine. Find yourself another prophet. I think I will be better off going this way.”

Well we all know how that turned out: Jonah got caught in a storm and thrown overboard, swallowed by a big fish, where he lived for three days before getting urped up on land. Lovely. It took all that for Jonah to come to his senses, to realize that God’s way might really be best, and to choose to follow Him in spite of how things looked on the surface.

Jonah didn’t doubt his ability to hear God–He heard him loud and clear. He doubted God’s judgment. He had certain expectations of how his life should go, and when God told him to do something that didn’t sync with that, he rebelled. Sound familiar?

I am too much like Jonah.

I expect my life to go a certain way, and when it doesn’t, I whine. “I don’t deserve this.” When that doesn’t work (does whining ever help?), I try to convince God He got it wrong. “I think you missed the mark here, God. This is not really the best plan, at least not for me. And here’s why…” Finally I rebel. “Thanks but no thanks. I’ll take it from here.”

How many times do I have to nearly drown before I accept that God really does know best? When will I learn that following God, even when my “better” judgment tells me not to, is the best way—the only way—to live? When will the truth sink in and take hold?

Because, the truth is, God sees the big picture, while I am only looking at one little puzzle piece. The truth is, God is crazy about me, and His way will lead me to the joyful, abundant life He so desires for me. The truth is, God’s plans for me won’t lead me to disaster. They are designed to give me a future and a hope.

The truth is, God’s judgment is much better than mine. Or yours.

Ditching the Jonah Life

Thankfully, just like with Jonah, God doesn’t quit pursuing us, even when we turn away. But God wants something better for us than this see-saw life of Jonah: defiant independence one moment, and a desperate plea for help the next. He wants us to trust Him, no matter what. He wants us to relax, knowing that no matter how things look, He’s got our back.

The more we trust God no matter what, the steadier our life-boat becomes. Peace seeps in. Joy peeks out from behind the clouds. Worry evaporates.

The more we trust, the more we rest.

Are you living the seesaw life of Jonah?