What Makes You Valuable?

By Lydia Floren

When I meet someone new, I do my best to avoid the fact that I am a physician. (Outside of work, of course. Hard to avoid that fact with a white coat and stethoscope!) I am not ashamed of my profession – far from it – but sometimes, that “MD” can really be a barrier when I am getting to know someone. For example, I can meet a person for the first time, we will be having a wonderful conversation, discovering mutual interests and telling funny stories, but that all changes if, somehow, it gets out that I am a doctor. It’s like a bomb goes off. My new friend will get this look on her face, and then maybe say, “Oh. You’re a doctor?” I’ll nod. “A medical doctor?” I’ll nod again. Silence. Then the questions: “Where do you practice? What kind of doctor are you? How long have you been doing this?”, and so on. In the space of a few moments, I have stopped being a person. I have become a stereotype.

We all identify one other by our roles, and may value each other based on achievement. But what makes you valuable? Secretly, at our core we each long to be understood and appreciated for who we are, not what we do,or who we know, or how much we possess.

This is exactly the way God values us. We don’t have to posture or pretend. He already knows the “real” us – our essence, our core identity. He values us – loves us – not because of our performance, but simply because we are. What a relief! We can finally come in from the cold of competition, and warm our hearts with His loving acceptance. His presence within us enables us to be fully alive, fully ourselves. And full of joy.

In Your presence is fullness of Joy. Psalm 16:11

I have come that you might have life, and have it more abundantly. John 10:10

Man looks at the outward things, but God looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7

I am fearfully and wonderfully made and my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

How about you? Do you feel sometimes that your value is based on your achievements or title? Or, the things our culture tells us are valuable? Leave a comment below.

Does God Have Favorites?

1 Reply

By Lydia Floren

I have a confession: It has always annoyed me when Jesus’ disciple, John, described himself as “the disciple Jesus loved.” When I see those words, my insecure, overachiever brain thinks like this:

Phase 1: Annoyance: “Boy, John really thought a lot of himself!”
Phase 2: Insecurity: “Does God have favorites? I thought He loved everybody. Does he love some people more than others? Where am I on his favorites list?”
Phase 3: Competition: “What makes John so special? Personally, I like Peter the best. He was one of the Big Three too, you know. And I’m not so bad either.”
Phase 4: Reality check: “You know, John didn’t call himself ‘The disciple Jesus loved MOST’, or ‘The ONLY disciple Jesus loved.’ He simply called himself ‘the disciple Jesus loved.’”

The truth takes awhile to work its way through my convoluted thought processes, but eventually I get it: John wasn’t proud of being loved by Jesus. He was awed by it. John had experienced Christ’s love so profoundly that it had become THE defining characteristic of his life. To John, Christ’s love was a magnificent gift, a bright light that obliterated all his faults and failings.

For example, In the gospel of John it is interesting to see what John didn’t say about himself. He didn’t identify himself by his

Importance: “John, one of the Big Three” (Peter, James and John), or
Role: the only disciple Jesus asked to care for His mother Mary, or
Occupation: “the Fisherman Disciple”, or
Family connection: John, a son of Zebede.
Accomplishments: the NYT bestselling author of 4 books in the Bible—yes, THE BIBLE.

John never said that he was “the disciple that loved Jesus,” although his life showed that he did love Him. John understood that even his ability to love was due to Christ’s love for him: “We love,” he pointed out in 1 John 4, “because He first loved us.”

I imagine John experienced Jesus’ love most profoundly when he was at his worst. John discovered that Jesus’ love did not waiver when he was imperfect, off track, or had his priorities mixed up. Jesus loved John just the same when he…

Cowered in the boat while his buddy, Peter, climbed out and walked on water.
Tried to manage things, like shooing the kids away, or sending the 5000 to scavenge for supper.
Stood by while his helicopter-mother jockeyed for a better position for him in heaven.
Conked out – in spite of Jesus’ plea to stay awake and pray – in Jesus’ greatest hour of need.
Hightailed it, when Jesus was arrested, and when they tore his clothes off while chasing him, he kept on running naked.

In his darkest times, John could understand that Jesus’ love was a gift with no strings attached: it had nothing to do with his performance, and everything to do with God’s grace. Jesus loves us the same way. God’s love has nothing to do with our performance, and everything to do with God’s grace. His love is as constant as the sun’s rise. So wherever you are – at your “best,” or at your worst, or somewhere in between – claim this truth by saying today: “I am the disciple Jesus loves.”

Does God have favorites? Of course He does. We are each His favorite.

The steadfast love of the Lord never changes. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is your faithfulness, O God. Lamentations 3:22-23

What about you? When do you experience the love of God?

Pushing the Reset Button Again and Again

4 Replies

by Lydia Floren

Reminders are funny things.

When I first stick that sticky note on my mirror, or the bracelet on my arm, it grabs my attention every time I see it, and does its job – it reminds me. But just like anything, once a reminder has been there a few days, it becomes part of the landscape – I don’t even seem to notice it.

That “R” drawn on my hand indicating a “reset button” has been different. Because it fades over time, I have to keep drawing it on my hand, and when I do, I remember why I am doing it. Because my mind wanders (I know this surprises you) I have thought of several other things that “R” can stand for, each reminding me to reset in some way:

Renew: my outlook on life, and be renewed by God’s grace.
Receive: God’s presence, His grace, His acceptance, His gifts, His provision, His fruit, His friendship. His guidance, wisdom, strength, appreciation, delight, love.
Refocus: on Jesus, on what is important in life, on my God-given priorities and goals.
Receive: God’s all-embracing love every day.
Re-experience: God’s forgiveness, His gift of freedom from condemnation.
Remember: my identity, value, belonging, calling.
Release: from guilt, condemnation, the past, my destructive thought patterns and actions.
Rejoice: in God’s love for me, in His trustworthiness, His care, His wisdom, His communication, His direction.
Resume: walking with Him.
Restart, rest, refresh, reengage, regroup, reassess, re-plan, revise – you get the idea.

Receive is a big one today.

Thank you, Father, for the ability to receive:

Your delight with me, your tender care, your wisdom, your perspective, your insights, your acceptance, your grace.
Your spirit-gifts: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.
Your love: patient, kind, humble, forgiving and forgetting of wrongs, strong, faith-filled and faithful, uncondemning, hopeful, enduring, never-failing.
Your presence: within me, restoring my soul.
Your embrace: including me, giving me a place and a purpose, helping me to discover, enjoy and share the many gifts you have given me.
Your calling.

Thank you for the ability to be able to receive Your calling for me to love others in the same way I love myself. Thank you for the privilege of giving, sharing, loving those around me, and the amazing sense of fulfillment and blessing that results from that, much of the time. Thank you that even when I feel nothing, or sense no positive feedback, I know deep in my soul that you are at work–that loving others with your love is powerful.

What do you need to remind yourself of today?

Rest for My Soul

1 Reply

heavy load

We fail.

We mess up. We make bad decisions, and many times the heavy load we carry is the result of those choices. When we recognize this, we pile on self-condemnation—guilt and shame. Not God, our Loving Father. He opens His arms wide, and says:

Child come here. Put down that heavy load, and climb up in My lap and tell Me all about it. Receive the grace, the forgiveness I so want to give you, and let me release you from your worry. Quit accepting shame, and embrace the freedom-joy of My love once again. Just leave it to Me. I will help you know what to do as you move forward from here.

I will not only show you what to do now, but I will help you learn from this. I can teach you to be free of your compulsions, to see more of the world from My perspective, so you don’t make this same mistake twice. If you choose, My Holy Spirit will do this deep healing in your spirit.

It is so much easier–and more enjoyable–to follow Me when you aren’t carrying unnecessary burdens. The load I give you is quite simple: stay connected with Me. Don’t let anything get in the way of this connection, especially not your mistakes. Don’t let anything keep you from embracing the identity, value, belonging and calling I have given you.

When you stay connected with Me, you will be able to hear my voice and follow where I am leading you to go.

I will show you the next step from here.

What helps you stay connected to God, even in the midst of failure?

By Lydia Floren

Image by woodleywonderworks

Kindness Is…

1 Reply

kindness photo

Kindness is saying no to what you could do so that you can say yes to what you’re called to do.

Kindness is allowing other people the space they need to grow.

Kindness is taking the time to learn someone’s name.

Kindness is remembering someone’s name.

Kindness is caring for yourself so that you can care for others.

Kindness is giving people the benefit of the doubt.

Kindness is choosing to think the best of someone.

Kindness is having a positive attitude.

Kindness is compassionate action.

Kindness is keeping a secret.

Kindness is not complaining. At all.

Kindness is refusing to guilt someone into doing what you want them to do.

Kindness is taking responsibility for your own life instead of blaming your problems on someone else.

Kindness is refusing to make excuses.

Kindness is tickling someone’s funnybone.

Kindness is laughing with folks but never laughing at them.

Kindness is choosing to have a thankful heart.

Kindness is refraining from giving advice.

What does kindness mean to you?? Let us know in the comments!

by Lydia Floren

Photo by Feed My Starving Children (FMSC)

The Kindness of God’s Acceptance

2 Replies

God’s acceptance of me boggles my mind, when I think about it.

Too often, I don’t – think about it, I mean. Instead, I hide from myself,or others, or Him. Yet hiding doesn’t change reality. No matter where I hide, He is there, with His arms open wide to me. He is fully aware of my faults and failings, and loves me lavishly in the middle of them. (BTW, one of the best ways to hide from yourself or God is to stay too busy.)

In order to receive the full measure of God’s acceptance, I must stop each day and remember that God knows my every thought before it becomes a word or an action, and is intimately acquainted with all my habits.

This is gritty reality. He accepts me knowing every unkind word I have uttered, every selfish act I have done, or will do. Even more daunting, God accepts me knowing the ugliness of the motives behind some of my words and actions, those things often hidden from others. He accepts me with my petulance, pride, manipulation, greed, impatience, annoyance. It boggles the mind.

You would think this would be depressing, but in truth, it is quite the opposite.

The understanding that finally someone knows me completely and loves me unconditionally, empowers me to accept myself with all my faults and failings, an to give my true self to Him each day, and allow Him to make me whole once again.

I can start each day:

Celebrating who I am – His precious child, made perfect by Him.
Rejoicing where I am – on His path to growth and wholeness, with Him showing me the way.
Embracing what I am called to do – love Him, others and myself – in the unique way He created me.

How are you starting your days? enclosedbehindbefore_lg

By Lydia Floren

The Kindness of Receiving

One of the kindest things I can do

with my life, is to choose to receive the love of God everyday. I know that seems contradictory, but just hear me out:

Taking the time each morning to receive God’s love, frees me to be the person I am meant to be. It allows me to shed

insecurities,
selfishness,
restlessness,
unforgiveness, and
self-condemnation.

Being loved also energizes me. It moves me to

love My Heavenly Father well.
love my neighbor better.
love myself more.

And, as I live in my belovedness, I can’t help but act on it. Experiencing God’s love ignites a fire in me to love those around me, and to act kindly towards others (for more about this, read Breathing In!). This may be in the form of a smile, a shared joke, a word of encouragement, a listening ear, a gift (delivered in secret, if possible), or a note.

Heart-Kindness

But even these aren’t the most far-reaching acts of kindness I can perform. The most precious acts of kindness are heart-kindnesses – decisions of the will. Heart-kindnesses can look like

withholding judgment,
giving grace,
forgiving,
letting go,
or apologizing.

Heart-kindnesses shape my attitude, my outlook on life. The more heart-kindnesses I choose to do, the more profoundly my outlook on life is transformed. And a joyful attitude is the most profound kindness I can give to the world. It affects every word I say and action I do.

The Fruit of the Spirit named “Kindness” will be manifested in my life only to the degree that I allow God’s love to move through me, prompting me to heart-kindnesses, transforming my attitude, and moving me to acts of service.

Has someone been particularly kind to you recently? We’d love to hear from you!

By Lydia Floren

Photo by procsilas

The Difficulty of Blessings

3 Replies

wheat photo

by Lydia Floren

Blessings can be much harder to handle than hardship. When God blesses us, if we do not immediately (and often) acknowledge that it is Him at work, we can quickly come to believe one of Satan’s whispered lies:

“You know, God had nothing to do with this. You did this yourself. You deserve this.”

We abandon God’s leading and return to our old way of thinking: God is not good, He does not care. We reject our growing connection with Him—our focus on following Him– and resort to self-dependence.

“I must do what I think will make me happy, and will make me feel good about myself.”

So, in good times as well as hard times, it is helpful to remember:

What we think will make us happy—pleasure, power and pride—only makes us more miserable. The momentary rush from these things is replaced by long term emptiness and gnawing discontent.
When our lives are spent trying to impress or please others–or ourselves–we are enslaved in the worst kind of way.
The only way to joy, contentment, peace, purpose, and long-lasting blessing is to follow the Father who loves you more than He loved His own son’s life. And to do so with an attitude of anticipation and trust.
That means accepting “no” and “not now” exactly in the same way we accept “yes”: with gratitude, knowing that God IS good, and DOES have your best in mind, and fervently wants you to overflow with joy and contentment and the passion of a high calling.
God loves, loves, loves to give good gifts to His precious children. And He knows what is truly good.

God loves you. He really does.

What do you do to remind yourself that God truly has your best interest at heart?

The Kindness of God, by Lydia Floren

4 Replies

ocean pray photo romans 2 4 When we don’t have prayers answered in the way we would like, particularly the ones that start with, “Lord give me….”, it may be because God knows what we desire is not good for us. At least not right now. Yet, when we don’t hear a “yes” we are tempted to believe God is holding out on us, instead of protecting us. Our stubborn hearts say, “Fine, you don’t want to give me this, so I will just get it for myself.” And we strike out on our own.

Good Gifts

When we follow this pattern, we move away from our growing understanding of God’s goodness. We forget that God DELIGHTS to give good gifts to His children. HE LOVES, LOVES, LOVES to give good gifts to His children. He does not try to spoil our fun. He tries to protect us, give us what we can handle, show us the way. He wants MORE for us, not less. He doesn’t want us to settle for the mediocre, when He is planning “fantastic” for just around the corner. When we choose our way over God’s, we are choosing to settle for less than His best, less than wonderful.

God’s leading is thoughtful, and it is kind.

He wants us to avoid the dangers that lurk beneath the surface of superficial satisfaction. He wants to keep us from trading true riches for false promises. But in order to receive the blessings He so much wants to give us, we must choose to follow His way, His timing, His wisdom. We must choose to say no to the enslavement of our impulses, and accept the growing freedom that comes from saying yes to His leading.

We must remember and believe that God is good.

Daily we need to turn back as quickly as possible, and remind ourselves again that every step God leads us to take, is one He has chosen because He loves us, and wants the very best for us. When we are off track, the kindest thing God can do for us is to lead us back to following Him.

Repentance is turning away from our own way of doing things, and turning back to reliance on God’s leading. It is the kindness of God that leads you to repentance.

What thoughts do you have? Please leave them below!

Photo by honorbound

Worth the Wait

1 Reply

O’Hare Airport: The Ultimate Test of

Patience, Part 4

(Click to read Part 1: The Scramble, Part 2: Cot City, or Part 3: Giving Thanks!)

We made it to Hilton Head, and spent four glorious days in a room overlooking the ocean. When we returned, people asked “how was your trip?” My mind immediately went to

sunrises over the water,
walks on the beach collecting shells,
discovering an old Civil War graveyard,
biking down flower-lined streets to a secluded park overlooking the bay,
wandering out to an isolated part of the beach at low tide with friends, finding sand dollars and conch shells inhabited by crabs,
eating great seafood at some wonderful restaurants, including low country boil, and some truly wonderful key lime pie, and
strolling through Savannah with my sweetheart.

The “O’Hare experience” was a forgotten nightmare only briefly recalled (just a little PTSD) as we passed through Chicago unimpeded on our way back home. Funny thing, a couple of our new/old friends from the original flight were on the plane with us back to Chicago. They were all smiles. They had a great time on their golf trip–36 holes the first day there.

It is amazing how blessings eclipse tough experiences when we let them. We remember what we choose to remember. We remember what we remind ourselves to remember. And what we share with others is either a gift or a downer.

All good things come to those who wait, especially in difficult situations. Being patient is possible when I know that God works all things to good for those who love him and are called according to His purpose. This truth gives me real hope: I can anticipate with joy the good God is doing and will do.

When did you choose to remember the good during a difficult situation?

Hope is anticipating wtih joy the good God is doing By Lydia Floren