Tag Archives: Belonging to God

God’s Gift to the World

“Oh, she thinks she’s God’s gift to the world.”

Have you ever heard someone say that? Or said it yourself? I know I have. When I have made that snarky comment, I really mean, “She is soooo conceited. She is totally self-focused. She only cares about what matters to her. She never thinks about anyone but herself.”

HMMM. “Self-focused”? “Always thinking about herself”? Sounds a lot like me sometimes, especially when I am having a pity party. (BTW, my pity party may have many invitees, but only one person will show up: me!)

God’s gift to the world.
In my prayers this morning, I learned to see that phrase, “God’s gift to the world,” in a whole different light. I was sharing my discouragement and discontent with God, (OK complaining ☺ He is such a patient listener!) and then I felt Him telling me:

“You are my blessing to the world. To the people you touch, the lives you reach. You alone can touch and reach people in your own unique way.”

Huh.

You know, when you look at it like that, every person is God’s gift to the world. We are each unique creations. No one can love someone else exactly like we can. And no one else will have the encounters we have this day. Because we will never pass this way again.

Each person is unique, and each moment is unique.

Each encounter is an opportunity to love someone in our own unique way.

You, my dear friend, are God’s gift to the world. So today, have a blast blessing those around you in your own unique way!

Enjoy who you are. Love the person in front of you. Live in the abundance of God’s love.

I will give thanks to you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14

Overcoming Fear

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by Lydia Floren

I have discovered that I can carry a lot of fear around with me. I have a fear of failure, fear of being rejected or disrespected. I am afraid of loneliness. Sometimes I am afraid that I don’t have what it takes to make and keep heartwarming, life renewing relationships. I am afraid that I am “not enough” (whatever that means), and I am afraid that I can’t fake it well enough to keep others from finding out. My fears can alter my reality, and change the way I respond to people and situations. Here’s how:

I beg
And I can act on my fears, by trying to be good enough. I try to

please people
grab attention
compete
do the best I can to be lovable

I beg for the love and acceptance I need so desperately. I am like a little kid whining for a treat.
But the few crumbs I get from others don’t satisfy my gnawing hunger.

I steal.
When my fears overwhelm me I start believing the worst: no one could ever really love me. And desperation sets in. My response?

Escape: I immerse myself in a project, or eat lots of chocolate, or withdraw into a book.
Retaliate. I get-angry-and-get-even by manipulating, or just snapping someone’s head off.
Complain. I steal other people’s joy by criticizing or complaining.

I steal peace and joy where I think I can find it.
But the glitter is not gold.

I hide.
When I am afraid, I tend to focus on myself: I try to

Protect myself so I can’t be rejected or hurt in the future.
Insulate myself with popularity or position or competence.
I keep others at arm’s length so they cannot know my weaknesses and hurt me with that knowledge.

But my hiding place is not safe, or secret.

There is a better way.

Overcoming Fear
There is a better way to be validated, and free from fear. It requires that I do something counterintuitive. I have to choose to quit looking at myself, and instead choose to look up.

When I take my eyes off my situation and start focusing on God, it changes everything. God is the most scary-smart [He makes MENSA look like preschool], wealthy, important, powerful person in the universe. And He loves ME. He cherishes ME. He considered me highly valuable, worth paying the price of His son’s life. He has adopted ME into His royal family. His secret service protects me 24-7.

There is nothing to fear.

My identity, value, belonging, and calling are secure. Nothing and no one can change these – not even me. Nothing anyone else does or says can alter this inner person that I am in any way. I am a precious, unique individual. I am loved. I belong in God’s family. I have a calling: to encourage and love others in my own unique way.

When I am not afraid, the world looks totally different, and I respond differently.

I quit begging for others to validate me with their attention, respect, admiration. I come out of hiding, because I am 100% safe. I stop trying to grab a cheap imitation for joy wherever I can find it, because I have already received the real joy of being completely known and loved.

I start serving. I just want to help others to see their unique precious identity, value, belonging and calling. I want them to know the safety of living life under the protection of the God of the Universe, who loves them much more than I ever could. I am aware of God with me, and want nothing more than for Him to lead me, and empower me to love those that cross my path.

Once I am deeply and completely satisfied in the waters of God’s love, I can really live. My cup overflows.

Let the joy begin!

Surely goodness and loving kindness shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23:6

Newlyweds

God is Good Company ( God’s Company Part 1)

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by Lydia Floren

One of the greatest things God has given me is the gift of His company.

Now, don’t get me wrong. When I say “company”, I don’t mean God’s business, World Incorporated, LLC. OK, yes, I might –might– have some control issues, but even I am not foolish enough to think that God would put me in charge of His whole international operation.

When I say “the gift of God’s company”, I’m talking about His presence. God, because of Christ’s sacrifice, gives everyone personal access to Him: the privilege of spending time in His company. And, His spirit actually lives within every person that chooses to become His child.

God’s spirit is actually with me, but also within me. Amazing.

God loves each of us without any conditions at all. Nothing will ever change that reality.

When I spend time with God, I feel like I am in the presence of a dear friend, or a loving parent. He knows my good parts and my ugly ones, and loves me right where I am. I don’t have to prove anything to Him, or to anyone. I am 100% safe.

When I am around someone who loves me and enjoys my company, I relax. I don’t feel the need to prove myself, or to protect myself from their judgment. I can be silly. Creative. Quiet. Contemplative. I tend to laugh more. And to worry less. It lifts my spirits, and it encourages me.

In God’s company, I can be utterly and completely myself.

It’s Not Just About You

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by Lydia Floren

A while back I wrote a blog It’s not about you or is it? Before we can turn our attention to loving others, we must first accept who we are, recognize our needs, and choose to allow God to meet our needs.

Two key parts of this process are:

Identifying faulty coping mechanisms or ways we have tried to meet these needs in the past.
Replacing these coping mechanisms with constructive habits that will make way for God to move in our lives and meet our needs.

Reminder: We all have needs.

Everyone has a need for food, shelter, but we also have needs that are in some ways deeper, needs for love and affection, a sense of identity and value, and belonging.

Coping mechanisms

And we all have developed habits—or ways of coping—in order to meet those needs. With some of these habits, we rely on ourselves. With others, we expect other people to meet our needs. Here are a few examples of coping mechanisms:

Grabbing what you can when you can: attention, love, stuff. Focusing on what you want, and not what god says you need. Calling wants needs.
Controlling things around you so that you can be comfortable and secure: our environment, relationships, and living by a rigid structure.
Denying that you have needs.
Escaping life by immersing yourself in TV, gaming, social media, alcohol or other means of escape.
Floating along, refusing to take responsibility for your life, your actions, or–even more telling—your inaction.
Expecting others to meet your needs. Relying on other people to make you happy. Assuming that anyone and everyone else’s job is to make you happy.
Assuming that your own happiness, comfort, and success is more important than someone else’s’, or that their happiness is more important than yours.

Replace these coping mechanisms. Living a life guided by God is living a life increasingly free of the faulty habits we have so carefully cultivated. In Psalm 139 David prays:

Search me Oh God, and know my heart. Try me and know my anxious thoughts. And see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way. Psalm 139: 23-24

Here are a few of God’s ways that can replace our coping mechanisms:

Giving. Keep what you will use, and give the rest away.
Letting go. Learning to rely on God to meet your needs and not yourself. The secret of being content in every situation, whether you have much or little.
Accepting your needs, and the importance that they are met.
Facing life, including its hard parts, knowing that you are not alone: God is with you and within you.
Owning your life. Quit playing the victim and accept responsibility, and that your decisions, as well as your indecisions, have consequences.
Releasing expectations. Hope in God, not people. God is the meeter of your needs, not other people. Sometimes He uses people, sometimes He doesn’t. But He often meets your needs in ways you don’t expect.
Recognizing that you are important, and everyone else is, too. Life isn’t a competition, it’s a collaboration.

Our needs are 100% met by Christ. Because of Him, we don’t have to hide, or hang on to anything or any person.

There is enough. There is more than enough. Our cup overflows.

And my God shall supply all of your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Phil 4:19

Once we accept the truth of God’s provision, we can take our eyes off ourselves and give as God would have us give–live as God would have us live.

Share with us: What are you doing to overcome your unhealthy coping mechanisms? How are you making room to let God in?

Be Still and Know that I am God, by Lydia Floren

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Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

In the swirl and stress of the holidays, or just daily living, God often uses these 8 words to restore my soul.

“Be still and know that I am God.”

The simple acts of being and knowing, free us from the Twilight Zone of Anxiety, the Abyss of Never Enough.

“Be still and know that I am God.”

Be.

Just be.
Be aware of being alive. Appreciate that you have a beating heart, and air to breathe.
Settle into the truth that
- You are fearfully and wonderfully made.
- You are wanted. Treasured. Valued. Loved.
- You are known and you are loved.

Be still.

Just stop. Rest. Take a breath. Or two. Be still.
Be still on the inside, as well as the outside.
Release all those thoughts swirling around in your head.
Take your mind off your responsibilities, your concerns, those things in your head that are nagging you.
Let go right now, and just be still.

And know.

Let truth sink in.
Be aware of what is real, and what is not.
What is beyond seeing and understanding—and is in the realm of just knowing.

Know that I

Know the Person who made you,
Who knows you better than you know yourself.
Who loves you with an everlasting love, which is in no way dependent on what you do or don’t do.
Who lives within you.
Who has your back.
Who has shown, and will show you how to live.
Who will never steer you wrong.
Who goes after you when you stray—deliberately or unintentionally–and brings you back to the path of life and joy.
Who restores your soul, leads you into the light and away from the darkness.
Who will never leave you or reject you.
Who keeps you safe—protects your identity, value, belonging and calling—for all eternity.

Know that I am God.

Know that this person–your heavenly father, your friend, your one and only guide in life, your creator—is God.

He is God.

He is

100% good.
The most powerful being in the universe.
Wise
Trustworthy
Present
Compassionate
Understanding
Forgiving
Non condemning
Full of life and joy
Available
Ready to show you a better way to live
Committed to walking with you on that way.

“Be Still and Know that I AM GOD.” Psalm 46:10

How has this truth changed your life? Please share with us!

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30

The Blessings of Giving Thanks

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by Lydia Floren

What one habit has most transformed your life? For me the answer would be the practice of thanks-giving.. Here are a few of the blessings of giving thanks that I have experienced:

Attitude. I see even a little blessing in life as a bonus, not a right, when I appreciate that my life—and everything in it—is a gift from God.

Contentment. I am free to enjoy each day–even if things are difficult–when I give thanks that God is working all things to good.

Trust. It is easier to trust God’s direction, especially when the future seems uncertain, as I give thanks for God’s love and goodness.

Fearless following. I can boldly follow God’s lead–the best i know it–as I give thanks for God’s commitment to safely guide me. I know that He will make any mid-course corrections if I misunderstand or just wander away for awhile.

Self-concept. I am at peace with who I am when I give thanks for my life–the unique blend of attributes that makes me “me”. It settles me. I have nothing to prove. I am valuable, and valued by the most amazing being in the universe, the person that made me.

Encouragement. I am en-couraged—given courage to be myself, when I appreciate my identity and value. And I can then en-courage others.

Hope. I have hope to see beyond a hardship when I am giving thanks in the middle of it. I can also more readily see benefits of those challenging situations.

Perspective. Giving thanks for eternity reframes my perspective, and reminds me what is really important.

Focus. Giving thanks for others takes my focus off myself.

Tolerance. When I give thanks for the unique gifts of others, I more inclined to celebrate differences, instead of being annoyed by them. I can appreciate that each person’s individuality makes life rich, just like one spice combined with another creates a wonderful flavor.

Freedom. Giving thanks for Christ’s sacrifice allows me to leave the past behind, and to quit beating myself for being “imperfect.” God completes me. In Him I am perfect.

Calling. There is nothing like the deep soul-satisfying joy of God working through me to love another person in my own unique way. Giving thanks to God for calling me to be loved, and then to love–Him, myself, and those I encounter–brings me joy.

Presence of God. Giving thanks in all things brings me into the very presence of God.

The practice of giving thanks in all things has changed–and continues to change–my life.

How has giving thanks blessed you? We’d love to hear from you!

It’s Not About You, Or Is It?

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by Lydia Floren

It’s Not About You. Or Is It?

It’s not about you. I have never understood that statement. Think about it. You are the only one living your life. You make your own choices. You experience life with your unique thought processes and personality. In reality, your life is–well–yours.

But it’s not JUST about you.

So what do people mean when they say “it’s not about you”? I think they really mean that your life is not just about you. It is about more than you. Here’s what I mean: You are not the only person in the universe. For example–and this is the most important by far, this universe is inhabited by God, your maker. In fact, you–your life– is a creative expression of God. You are His masterpiece. In addition, there are other people like you inhabiting this world, people with life, wants, and needs just like you. And, for good or ill, your choices impact your connection with your creator, and influence other people in your little corner of the world.

Here’s the problem: if you have not learned to accept and appreciate yourself, YOU are all you can think about. You focus on trying to get your needs met. Conversely, when you are at peace with yourself, you have the capacity to focus outward instead of inward, blessing others instead of expecting from them.

Everyone is needy–everyone has needs. In order to move beyond yourself, you have to

1. Face your needs and then 2. Choose to look first to God—not other people—to meet those needs.

Our Needs:

We all recognize our needs for food, clothing, and shelter, but we often ignore important needs that go beyond the physical. Only when we acknowledge these needs, and they are truly met, can we move past ourselves. For example, we all need

Identity–a sense of who we are as a person, an understanding and appreciation of ourselves as a unique individual
Value–a belief–and solid reason for the belief–that we are valuable
Belonging–a place in the world where we feel safe, and at home–where everyone knows our name.
Calling/direction–a sense of purpose, and genuine hope that we can fulfill that purpose.
Safety–the deep knowing that you are protected: that nothing and no one can destroy you.

We try hard, mostly in subconscious ways, to meet these very essential needs, but come up empty most of the time–and for good reason: it is impossible. There is no way that we–or any other person on the planet–can meet these needs. That doesn’t keep us from trying. Many promising relationships wither under the heat of our unrealistic expectations: that someone else can, and should, meet our most basic needs.

God is the only person that can satisfy our hunger for identity, value, belonging, calling, and safety. Quite frankly, God not only CAN fill this void in our lives, He has already given us the means to do so. But He always gives us the choice of whether or not to accept His provision. How do we recognize God’s provision, and accept it? A good place to start is to invite Him into your life, and cultivate the habit of giving thanks in all things.

Give thanks to God for:

Your identity: the combination of personality, temperament, history, giftedness, passions, and connections that makes you totally unique in the world.
Your value: as His precious child, someone He paid a very high price to adopt into His family. You are cherished and loved by the most amazing being in the universe. The Person that knows you best loves you most.
Your belonging: as a member His family, And your belonging in this moment in time, and in this place in the universe: You are not here by accident. You belong where you are.
Your calling/direction: to love God, yourself and others in your own unique way as you live your life.
Your safety: nothing/no one can touch or change your identity, value, belonging and calling IN ANY WAY. These are safe, and protected by God. As God’s child, your existence is safe for eternity.

Be thankful for you, the person you are and are becoming.

Be thankful for God, who fills your deepest needs abundantly, beyond all that you can ask or imagine.

And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

A Note in Your Lunchbox: Giving Thanks in All Things

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By Lydia Floren

For years I packed lunches for my husband and kids. Because food is NOT my thing, I tried lots of different ways to streamline this, including making 20+ PB&J sandwiches at a time, and freezing them for the week. That way, all I had to do in the morning rush, was grab one from the freezer and throw it in a box with a few other prepared items. Most days, I tucked a card in each lunch with a Bible verse written on it – a little spiritual refreshment for midday, to go along with the physical nourishment.

Typically, I wrote out these verse cards in the early morning, when the house was still quiet. As I prayed and meditated, preparing for the day, I would ask God to focus me on one particular verse to share, and if there was anything additional He was leading me to share. Then I would pull out my stack of blank cards and start writing. Five cards each day. Twenty-five handwritten cards per week.

Did those verse cards have an impact on my family? Yes, I know they did for 2 reasons: -The kids have told me so. (They still have some of those cards.) -God’s word is powerful. It always has an impact.

Sure, there were some days those notes didn’t get read. But other days, they were read over and over again, and even shared with friends at the lunch table. Samuel says he used to pass them around, so everyone could take a shot at deciphering my handwriting. (Who knew that my doctor-handwriting would have a positive benefit?)

The Power of Habit

Those cards impacted my family, but what I didn’t realize until years later, was how much they influenced me. The practice of writing out 25 verse cards a week enabled God’s truths to penetrate deep into my heart. They pop into my head at unexpected – and timely – moments, blessing me with their God-inspired wisdom.

The Habit of Giving Thanks in All Things

I think there are lots of habits – repetitive choices – that bless our lives, and then keep on blessing us. They start with small decisions in a moment or day, but their cumulative effect is powerful. There are several other such habits that have blessed me like this over the years, but one rises to the top: giving thanks in all things.

Thanksgiving Restores My Joy.

Choosing – repeatedly – to give thanks in all things, changes my perspective. It shifts my focus, from my problems and weakness, to His sufficiency and grace. Thanksgiving also changes my attitude. It refreshes my hope in the future, and strengthens my faith in God’s goodness. Most important, thanksgiving restores my joy. In the practice of thanksgiving, I remember that God is at work, and He does love me and everyone else in the world.

Things to give thanks for:

The last 24 hrs. People and events. God works all things to good.
God, my loving Father
- His love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
- His working in my life and in this world, even when I don’t see it.
- His commitment to me personally, to always be with me – within me, to restore my soul every day, to lead me in the way I need to go.
Myself
- The gift of life, and of this day.
- My unique identity, value, belonging, and calling.
- My limitations, and God’s limitlessness.
Others
- Those I know (especially those that are dear to me), and those I don’t know
- Those I will cross paths with
My concerns
- That God knows my concerns before I do, and he will take care of them, and lead me in the next step.
- Perspective: Problems are just opportunities for God’s work to shine.
The next 24 hrs.
- The people and circumstances I will encounter in this day.
- God’s faithfulness to lead me in the way I need to go.
- God will work all things to good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.

Giving thanks in all things,the habit of thanksgiving, is like writing a note for your lunchbox: a message of hope that seeps into your heart and soul bringing refreshment when you least expect it, and may most need it.

Please share with us: what are you thankful for?

What Makes You Valuable?

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By Lydia Floren

When I meet someone new, I do my best to avoid the fact that I am a physician. (Outside of work, of course. Hard to avoid that fact with a white coat and stethoscope!) I am not ashamed of my profession – far from it – but sometimes, that “MD” can really be a barrier when I am getting to know someone. For example, I can meet a person for the first time, we will be having a wonderful conversation, discovering mutual interests and telling funny stories, but that all changes if, somehow, it gets out that I am a doctor. It’s like a bomb goes off. My new friend will get this look on her face, and then maybe say, “Oh. You’re a doctor?” I’ll nod. “A medical doctor?” I’ll nod again. Silence. Then the questions: “Where do you practice? What kind of doctor are you? How long have you been doing this?”, and so on. In the space of a few moments, I have stopped being a person. I have become a stereotype.

We all identify one other by our roles, and may value each other based on achievement. But what makes you valuable? Secretly, at our core we each long to be understood and appreciated for who we are, not what we do,or who we know, or how much we possess.

This is exactly the way God values us. We don’t have to posture or pretend. He already knows the “real” us – our essence, our core identity. He values us – loves us – not because of our performance, but simply because we are. What a relief! We can finally come in from the cold of competition, and warm our hearts with His loving acceptance. His presence within us enables us to be fully alive, fully ourselves. And full of joy.

In Your presence is fullness of Joy. Psalm 16:11

I have come that you might have life, and have it more abundantly. John 10:10

Man looks at the outward things, but God looks at the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7

I am fearfully and wonderfully made and my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

How about you? Do you feel sometimes that your value is based on your achievements or title? Or, the things our culture tells us are valuable? Leave a comment below.