{"id":1576,"date":"2017-07-07T18:50:20","date_gmt":"2017-07-07T23:50:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/?p=1576"},"modified":"2019-05-17T15:01:48","modified_gmt":"2019-05-17T20:01:48","slug":"the-s-word","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/2017\/07\/07\/the-s-word\/","title":{"rendered":"The S Word"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/The-S-Word.jpeg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-1577 size-full\" src=\"http:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/The-S-Word.jpeg\" alt=\"&quot;The S Word&quot; written on a lemon tree.\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/The-S-Word.jpeg 640w, https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/The-S-Word-300x200.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/The-S-Word-624x416.jpeg 624w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a>by Lydia Floren<\/p>\n<p>One of our favorite family phrases comes from the movie Aladdin.\u00a0 The little parrot, Iago, gets all upset and starts venting to his boss, the evil Jafar.\u00a0 Jafar\u2019s response is simply this: \u201cPaaaaatience, Iago. Paaaatience.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>What gets us so riled up, that we lose our patience with ourselves or others? For me, it is the S word.\u00a0 No, not the four-letter S word\u2026.the six-letter one:\u00a0 \u201cshould.\u201d\u00a0 When \u201cshould\u201d creeps into my thoughts and makes its way into my conversations, patience goes out the window. Joy is replaced by restless discontent.\u00a0 I start focusing on what is wrong instead of what is right.<\/p>\n<h3><b>\u201cThey should be doing this. I should be doing that.\u201d<\/b><\/h3>\n<p>\u201cThey should fill all of these potholes.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cI should get more respect.\u201d \u201cThe computer system should always work perfectly.\u201d \u201cI should be able to manage my time better, or be a better person.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Should is a toxic word. It poisons our peace and eats away at our patience. Shoulds stress us out and put stress on those around us.<\/p>\n<h4><b>Cure for the S word<\/b><\/h4>\n<p>The cool thing is, there is a cure for the S word&#8211;the \u201cshould\u201d infection. It\u2019s the T word: thanksgiving. The practice of giving thanks in all things stamps the shoulds right out of our life. Gratitude banishes discontent, restores our joy, and replenishes our patience.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you Father, that we have paved streets, and that these potholes will eventually be filled.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cThank you that You respect and value me, and are teaching me to respect and value myself.\u201d \u201cThank you that the computer system works 99% of the time, and there is a great team of people working on keeping it that way.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><b>It doesn\u2019t come easy.<\/b><\/p>\n<p>Replacing the &#8220;S&#8221; word with the &#8220;T&#8221; word takes some practice. It doesn\u2019t come easy.\u00a0 In fact it can feel quite awkward and contrived, especially at first.\u00a0 But, it is incredibly powerful at restoring our perspective and our joy.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank You that every single one of us is imperfect and in process, and You love us right where we are.\u201d \u201cThank You that we are each fearfully and wonderfully made.\u201d \u201cThank You that I don\u2019t need to do anything to earn your love, and there is nothing I can do that will change it.\u201d \u201cThank you that You are always present and at work, and working things to good.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThank you that there is always, always, always something to be thankful for.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>When we cultivate a grateful heart we quit \u201cshoulding\u201d all over ourselves and those around us. Our words and actions are motivated by love instead of driven by discontent.<\/p>\n<p>How has the &#8220;S&#8221; word invaded your life?\u00a0 What happens when you replace it with the &#8220;T&#8221; word?<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/petunia.jpeg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-1578 size-full\" src=\"http:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/petunia.jpeg\" alt=\"&quot;patience&quot; on purple petunias\" width=\"640\" height=\"495\" srcset=\"https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/petunia.jpeg 640w, https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/petunia-300x232.jpeg 300w, https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/07\/petunia-624x483.jpeg 624w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Lydia Floren One of our favorite family phrases comes from the movie Aladdin.\u00a0 The little parrot, Iago, gets all upset and starts venting to his boss, the evil Jafar.\u00a0 Jafar\u2019s response is simply this: \u201cPaaaaatience, Iago. Paaaatience.\u201d What gets us so riled up, that we lose our patience with ourselves or others? For me, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[8,37,23,24],"class_list":["post-1576","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-hope-and-encouragement","tag-patience","tag-perfectionism","tag-thankfulness"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v24.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>The S Word - Belovedlove<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/belovedlove.org\/reflections\/2017\/07\/07\/the-s-word\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The S Word - Belovedlove\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"by Lydia Floren One of our favorite family phrases comes from the movie Aladdin.\u00a0 The little parrot, Iago, gets all upset and starts venting to his boss, the evil Jafar.\u00a0 Jafar\u2019s response is simply this: \u201cPaaaaatience, Iago. 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